At The End of The Day

…and how apt they are to my own situation…

"The loudest sound of all, love unspoken." Dawson’s Creek (TV serials), circa 2000.

"The heart wants what it wants or else it does not care." Emily Dickinson

God, I mean to let go - and I’m usually good at this - but here I am, still hung up with memories and the feeling of not wanting to forget, not wanting to give up hope.

For the first time in history (again), I wish for someone to tell me what to do. Usually I know what to do, even if I don’t want to. But now, I’m just clueless.

Some of the time, I tell myself, How stupid can you be? Let it go and move on.

And some of the time, I think, I can’t. I can’t. I like Emily Dickinson’s quote because once, I thought I knew what it felt like but now I know exactly how it feels. If I can’t have what I want, I just don’t care about anything else anymore.

God. This is crazy.

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